Substitute Teachers Lounge

Rational Choices in the Heat of Emotion: Substitute Teaching and Social Media

March 19, 2024 Greg Collins Episode 252
Substitute Teachers Lounge
Rational Choices in the Heat of Emotion: Substitute Teaching and Social Media
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Ever found yourself caught between the heart and the head when making a decision? This episode wanders through the labyrinth of emotional versus rational choices, particularly in the often unpredictable realm of substitute teaching and the wild west of online social spaces. We dissect the Substitute Teacher's Lounge Facebook group's penchant for anonymity and its impact on shared stories. I don't just muse over the content; I throw down the gauntlet, challenging educators to step into the light with their positive tales with the same gusto as they do their grievances. As we navigate these tales, we consider the far-reaching consequences of our decisions, be they in the throes of a classroom or the tension of a timeshare pitch.

Speaker 1:

Greg Collins. Substitute Teacher's Lounge, march 19th 2024. I've made some observations from the Substitute Teacher's Lounge Facebook group that I want to share with you. They have to do with negative posters and positive posters and something I've noticed about both. And then, just for good measure, we're going to mix in what Substitute Teachers do when they make decisions emotionally instead of rationally. Substitute Teacher's Lounge Music.

Speaker 1:

You might be thinking what has possessed Greg to make an episode about emotional decisions? And I'll be more specific than that, because you can be about as generic with that type of thing as you want to be. I mean, generally speaking, I think all of us already know that if you make negative type decisions with your emotions, they're usually the wrong decision. There are some emotional decisions that are proper. You know, maybe when you choose to get married, when you choose to make a commitment to some type of program, those can often be emotional decisions that work out.

Speaker 1:

But there is a reason I bring this up because, whether you like it or not, on my Substitute Teacher's Lounge Facebook group, for some reason two years ago Facebook decided to let you post anonymously. I don't like that on my page. Here's the main reason why, if you're going to post something on there. I don't mind controversy. I don't mind heated discussions. As long as you don't direct your comments directly at somebody, I don't mind any of that. What I mind is that you're not so enough on what you're posting to post with your name. Maybe you're more of a troll that's just going there to get things stirred up. As much as you can. You'll post anonymously so nobody can trace it to you. So my people know that I want them posting with their name. There are a limited number of exceptions, obviously. If you're posting something negative about a school, it is possible that people that read that with your name will then know what school you were talking about and it could have ramifications. I understand all that. That's not what I'm talking about. In fact, I will let you post anonymously on there if that's what needs to be done. But here's the observation I've made about all that, and then I'm going to relate it to the classroom.

Speaker 1:

A couple of things that have happened. It seems like they all happened close to the same time. Let me tell you what started out. This Last week somebody posted on the page anonymously. Now, the way this works as an admin, I actually see your name. I'm not even sure my posters know that when you post anonymously, I or anybody I designated to be an admin which right now is just me I can see your name, I can keep track of your name, I can actually. Facebook actually allows me to see statistics about you that shows not just how many times I've had to reject your post but how many times you've been rejected on other pages as well, and that is designed so that we don't have the trolls. You know there are Many times we'll all see like a generic type of name. Now, as long as they agree to abide by the rules, I'll still approve them, because I don't necessarily know that they're a quote, nobody or a troll that was to come to our Facebook group, but that's just to kind of protect the page, the integrity of the page. I guess maybe it's the best way to say that last week Someone posted an anonymous Notemlessly and I'll let you go back and look at it on the page if you wanted.

Speaker 1:

Still there, it's a few posts down but and you'll see my comment. They posted about an absolutely great experience that they had had in a school that they wanted to share. They posted anonymously, which I went ahead and improved as soon as I approved it I jumped up and said this is a great story, but why post anonymously? And and the poster replied it still said anonymous member. Something to the effect of I Just really feel cautious about posting anything publicly about my district and work.

Speaker 1:

Here's my reply and hence what this episode is about. I said anonymous member. It's just that there are so many bad posts on here that people proudly post their name to, and Then great uplifting posts that people don't claim. It just sadly seems backwards to me. Now Think whatever you will about my response, but that's the way I feel. That's who I am. If you're different than that, I understand that, but I hope I have at least planet the seed.

Speaker 1:

Stand up for your great schools. Maybe that school needs more substitutes and if you pose something like that, then Perhaps more substitutes will like to go there. But then I relate it to school. I mean, how often do the negative people stand up and Don't mind everybody seeing them being as negative as possible when the nice people, maybe in that situation, in a live situation, keep their mouth shut? It's sad to me. I Want to go on record as saying and encouraging you that when you have positive information to share in a public place. Be proud of it. If you have negative information to share, go ahead. But instead of just talking negative all the time, share some ideas about what you would do To correct the situation. Don't just talk about somebody or about how bad you've been treated Without saying you know. Here's probably how they've could have handled that better. Now, with all that in mind, let's turn to the classroom On a completely different podcast, different topic and everything.

Speaker 1:

I won't tell you what it is. It's great podcast, but I'll probably just leave it that you want to know. Hint, send me a direct message. It has to do with travel, but anyway. One of them was mentioning a timeshare situation and referred to Whether people make decisions rationally or Emotionally, and oftentimes it's emotional. You know as well as me, I'm going to guess, especially if you're maybe over the age of 30 and In a position to do this, that perhaps you have taken some trips where they try to Get you to meet with them, to sell you a timeshare, and you may get a free meal of it out of it or a couple of nights, but they know what they're doing. They know that if they get you in a situation and Pressure you to buy that perhaps they can get you to make a decision for lack of a better phrase with your heart Rather than with your head. Now, you all know I have a financial background, but I'll be the first to say that there are some situations where maybe the financial Decision is Not the final way to go. I mean, what if I decided I wanted to buy something and I realize it's gonna make me uncomfortable for a couple of months in other financial situations, but I know how much happiness it is gonna add to my life. Well, I might still go with it, even though that's not the rational Decision.

Speaker 1:

We are faced with this type of thing in the classroom all the time. We maybe even on a daily basis. It doesn't matter how great my classes have been in a day, there's always a student or two that are more challenging, no matter what type of class. I have told you that some of these challenge Students classes that I have taught I've actually enjoyed I Shouldn't say more than, but I enjoy them very much because smaller class size the kids tend to not be disciplinary issues most of the time, depending on what situation you're in.

Speaker 1:

I like those kind of classes, but when I'm faced with the other kind, where I'm challenged, I've got two ways to react. I can react emotionally. If I do that, you know what that means. That means I snap back at the student. I'm going to make sure I'm yelling. I'm probably yelling at them. Everybody else in the room is looking at me and it doesn't matter if you go back later and apologize, even when you didn't need to. All those students saw you do that and they can't get that image out of their mind to this day. I have probably yelled in the classroom in six years, I'm going to say at the most half a dozen times. You know what happens.

Speaker 1:

I run into a student from one of those classes that they were in. Maybe they didn't even cause the problem, but they were in it and they heard me react that way. Well, you know what. They still remember it. They remember the other positive interactions I had with them too. But those are the negative ones, the ones where I react it with my emotions, without thinking it through, instead of maybe a more rational, logical, thought-out reaction. They remember the negative part. So here's what we can do to help compensate for that. You know, maybe you even want to take the time to pause this. Get a piece of paper or however you take notes. I'll take my notes on my phone. Write down five situations that you can remember that challenged you in a class. You might have five from today or at least from this week, five situations and how you react it. Then come back to this looks like about the 13 minute mark and see if you could have done better in that situation.

Speaker 1:

The times I overreacted, I felt guilty right away and apologized to the student. Let me tell you this. This happened in the last couple of days. I won't be any more specific than that. There was a student. I made a comment to him to the degree and I've taught him since the sixth grade, and this has been six years ago and I said actually something to the effect of are you acting this way? But just because you know I'm nice and you think I won't say anything to you and he didn't necessarily say anything right that moment, but you know, when he saw me in the hallway after class, he went out of his way to come up and bump this with me and said Mr Collins, you're not mad at me, are you? I said no, I'm not mad at you. I was joking around with you, just like you were joking around with me. And he said good, I wouldn't want you to be mad at me Now, I could have. I made a. I didn't make an emotional decision in the moment, I made more of a rational decision in the moment I'm just thinking all right, correct, correct, two ways. I did make the comment about him challenging me because I was a nice person and but I could have blown off the handle. I at least let him know where I stood. That came up, caused him to come up to me and apologize and we went from there.

Speaker 1:

Had I been an emotional decision and yelled at him, that student may never want me to substitute teach their class anymore. They may have told all their friends about me, the students that were in my class. I guarantee you, because it's so much out of character for me, by the end of the day there would be a lot of students that heard about how Mr Collins yelled out in class because that is so outside my normal reaction. So I'll say all that to say this. I guess that's one of my most popular cliches, isn't it that? And, to be honest, we'll have to go through there and count all of those one day, but anyway. So you're gonna be faced with all kinds of decisions in the classroom. Some of them you will have to react quickly and immediately. But those aren't emotional decisions. Those are necessary, rational decisions. But if you catch yourself, look back at your list of five that you made and if you can see a pattern where you react it emotionally too often, well then you know not to work on.

Speaker 1:

Moral of the story, try your best to react rationally instead of negatively I should say that over rationally instead of emotionally. When something negative happens, it's easy enough. When something's positive happens, something positive happens, you can react emotionally hand out candy, whatever. But think that through. And then, on the flip side, if you're a poster on social media, are you one of those that likes to post things negative just to get people stirred up, or are you one of those that likes to post things positive just to let people know that occasionally things go well? I like the positive people. I like the negative people too, but I wish they would think about what they're posting and I want you positive people to stand behind what you say just as much as those that post negative comments. So you've heard it, you've heard the episode. Do your best to go out there and be as positive as possible and make the decision that makes sense.

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