Substitute Teacher Regrets

Have you ever been haunted by a decision you made years ago?  Join me in the Substitute Teacher's Lounge where, amidst the chuckles and sighs, we unravel the complex feelings of remorse that accompany the teaching journey. This isn't just another series of classroom anecdotes; it's an honest confession booth where I confront my past in the hopes of guiding fellow educators toward a future free of such heavy-hearted reflections.

Transcript

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Teacher's Regrets and Reflections

Speaker 1 0:00

This is Greg Collins , substitute Teacher's Lounge . It is February 20th 2024 . It is episode 248 . And I know you saw the word regrets in the title and I know what you're already thinking . You're thinking , all right , collins already feels bad about the last two episodes . I did one called my Worst Substitute Teacher Day ever . I did another one last week about how kids have changed , you know , sort of for the worst since the COVID shutdown and they're still recovering from it . But no , I stand by those episodes . That's not what I'm regretting , but I will tell you this .

Speaker 1 0:43

There are some things that happened in the past week that made me think what are the things that I've actually done in the classroom or related to substitute teaching in one way or another ? Then I came to regret later , or maybe that I even regret it immediately on doing it . So we're gonna talk about things today that we've done , that we've regretted Substitute Teacher's Lounge . All right , well , shoot , let's start with a funny regret , because I hadn't run that opening music segment for a while because it has students' voices on it , and I recorded it when they were in the classroom and I was like , oh , I'm gonna do it , I'm gonna do it , and I recorded it when they were in the sixth grade and they're no sophomores , so it was four years ago . So I said you know I need to take that off . And then this week one of the students said hey , are you still using our voices on the opening for your podcast , which told me two things . He hadn't listened to it in a while , said he was gonna listen to it again here soon , but it's back . I'm gonna put it back on there because I love the sound of those students' voices . We were just sitting around . I had gotten permission from the school that day to record them for other reasons interviews , like four years ago , and we had parents' permission and all that kind of stuff . So that's kind of cool .

Speaker 1 2:24

Another thing you know , when I talk about regrets , I remember a story from my own family that came to bother me . It was back when my daughter was about , I'd say , 12 years old and she's 38 . Now , so it's been a while , but anyway I remember coming in she had found out and this is back when there wasn't a whole lot of streaming going on , of course , and we had one TV and one channel . It could be on at any time . Of course . We could record and watch things later . One of her favorite episodes of a show was coming on . She saw it in the guide . She went and got , didn't really get ready for the show , but she went and got dressed and changed and cleaned up because she knew she was going to go somewhere right after the show and she wanted to be ready and of course , me being the jerk , I come in . There is a ballgame on that afternoon that I wanted to see and I pulled ranker on her a little bit and to this day I regret that a little bit . I'm thinking what was I thinking ? I mean , I could have figured out something else to do in that situation .

Speaker 1 3:34

But last week my wife ran into a person at the school from which I based the story . On that I've talked about the last two weeks , last couple of weeks more so the worst day episode and it came up in conversation and they talked about it a little bit and my wife told me they talked about it a little bit . They understood my wife had had a similar experience there the year prior with a group that are now high school students , so she wouldn't see them again anyway . But my wife's more of an elementary school teacher , I have come to find out , I'm more of a high school teacher . I told you last week that one of the sixth graders at the school I didn't want to go back to for a while has asked me to come back . And you know , with that sweet little voice , and I'm thinking , man , do I regret making that decision ? And I don't for the moment . But it made me think about this whole topic of regrets . What are some things that I regret having done ? If I had to do them over , I may still do the same thing .

Speaker 1 4:46

If I tell you something that I don't like doing , something I may have even said that I'd never do , and then I did . You know , it's kind of the old phrase where I used to say that I hated it when my parents would say because I said so and I told myself I would never do that with my own kids , and I'm sure I did . I might not have said it in those exact words , but I did . You know , I did some things like that as well . But the first thing I'll talk about I'm gonna talk about one serious one with students , one serious one with the teachers . Actually , that I've regretted doing the first one with the students .

Speaker 1 5:27

I've got this pet peeve . I just absolutely hate the phrase shut up . That is so I even say it sinister . It is such a negative phrase . I will say be quiet . I will say , guys , you need to go down to a level one . But you know , a lot of times that doesn't work and , to be honest , I've never told a whole class to shut up , it's just one kid that never gets the message . So even after I've said I would never say shut up , I have in fact had to use that phrase from time to time . I'm gonna say in six years I've used it no more than 10 times , so not even twice a year . So I don't do it much .

Speaker 1 6:19

But sometimes I think students will take advantage of my niceness . They know Collins is in here , he's not gonna yell at us . But then one student acts out of hand and I finally just say the words very loudly shut up . And I think a word , an adjective , I guess it's an adverb that I would use to describe the reaction is shocking . The students immediately are quiet , not quiet forever , but they're quiet because they know that is so far outside of my character that I basically accomplished what I was going for by using that method . I've had a student in later years .

Speaker 1 7:13

Tell me , mr Collins , that was the only day you scared me because I had to tell somebody to shut up that day and the day that in question from the episode two weeks ago , you probably can guess it I used the word shut up on one student and he didn't . Neither did the other students . We won't go there again . I'm not gonna relive that again , but I will tell you this . Maybe you use that all the time and I am not here to preach to you . If it's working for you and that's the worst thing you say to these students , maybe it's okay , but I just cringe . It bothers me for days after I've had to use that phrase in the classroom . So first thing I regret is using the phrase shut up , because I just think that is so mean and I'm not that person . Maybe the reason the students like me to come back is that I'm not that person . By the way , I will say this I'm starting to get a feel for it , given these students that I've been describing to you the last two weeks I'm still a substitute teacher that most students want to come back . I just don't feel like I'm where I used to be . Maybe that's me . Maybe I've done things . I should be regretting that I don't .

Speaker 1 8:40

But first thing using shut up in the classroom , find something else , find be quiet , I don't know what you do maybe a reward system of some type . Buy a bag of Jolly Ranchers again Now . That class that day I was given out little bags of nerd gummy clusters snack size bags to one student , but I told them that the whole class had to behave for one student to be eligible for that candy at the end . And they didn't . It wasn't everybody , but I wanted them to know that you cost the students in the class a chance for this candy . Didn't give it out to them . They know who the problem was . He's the problem in the class . Every time he's in their class they come to expect it and , to be honest , I don't think he regrets it . He's not gonna change . I can think that he was actually proud of the way he's acting . That's what I've seen in some of these students lately . Okay , enough on that one .

Speaker 1 9:50

Let's talk about things that I've done , that I would continue to do , but still I regret it and it bothers me . To this day Happened on two occasions . I've told you this before , but it's been a while I went through a phrase counting getting hired as a full-time teacher right after COVID , where I taught a year . I actually went through two and a half years , where that's not right . It's actually one full year and then the next year in from August to February . So I gotta get my math straight . So I was doing all that .

Speaker 1 10:29

Now I'll admit , maybe in my subconscious , one of the reasons to leave the class I was getting ready to leave was because of one class of students . Even the good students in that class tried to straighten them out . They later asked me are one of the reasons you're leaving ? And I said you know , I'm not gonna lie to you , you're part of the reason I wanted to leave anyway . Maybe you kind of pushed me over that bump .

Speaker 1 10:58

I was trying to anticipate when to do it and here's the deal I had substitute taught in this particular class . It was , I think it was an eight-week commitment . After four weeks I wanted to . I was retired , my wife was retired , my brother and me were starting to do things together . He lives in South Carolina and we wouldn't meet . We wanted to meet in Nashville to go to a ball game or actually a tournament . So it was a Wednesday through Sunday , sec basketball tournament and I find just total guys .

Speaker 1 11:32

I sent a very formal email , copied the vice principal , the teacher I was subbing for , and I said listen , I hate to do this because I'm never one of those that wants to back out on a commitment . So I need to back away from this long-term job right now because there's some things I want to do with my brother , there's some traveling I want to do with my wife and I can't do it when I'm tied down to the long-term . I wish I had planned this better . So I knew from the beginning to say no , I apologize . They were extremely understanding , to the point of on my last day they the principal even came up to my room . They said all right , students , mr Collins , last day I know you're gonna miss him , here's what we're gonna do from this point forward . They actually moved some students around , so they had some plans for that . So I regret that to this day .

Speaker 1 12:35

I did it one other time . I was helping out a principal whose daughter was one of my favorite students no-transcript , I forgot , I don't even remember what came up , but I had to back on that , out on that commitment . I've done that twice now and I regret it . I hope they're listening because I regret that so much . If I had to do it over I'm not gonna lie to you I would still do the same thing , but it's still something that bothers me because I don't like to back out on commitments and I hope you're that way too .

Speaker 1 13:10

Now let's talk about sarcasm a little bit . I'm not sure I Am a very sarcastic person . I use sarcasm in the classroom . I will even tell new students you might as well get ready , because the better I get to know you , the more sarcastic I'm gonna become . Sometimes I can see embarrassment in their face . I really have to be careful about that . We all do . We Think about funny things to say that will make other kids Laugh in the class , but we really , I'll say I I really have to be careful about what I say . I don't want to embarrass students , I just want to joke around with students and so I use sarcasm in the classroom a lot .

Speaker 1 13:59

The other day this past week it was in a classroom I was being sarcastic . Another student was being sarcastic with me . They know I kind of like that stuff . I will allow them to learn to respectful and I'm gonna tell you what he did and you're you're gonna think that it was Disrespectful . I thought it was hilarious . He was talking , I was talking , I was joking around . He picked up the remote control for the projector and held it towards me and clicked a mute and started

Substitute Teacher's Motivation and Caution

Speaker 1 14:29

laughing .

Speaker 1 14:29

Now I've already talked to some of the teachers that would not have stood for that , but you know , I kind of had a feeling I egged it on a little bit . So I did . I laughed with him and I said alright , let me issue you a challenge . There's a student teacher in this classroom today . You're taking a ten-word vocabulary quiz . I have not Seen the words that you have been studying . They are pretty good Challenging words . There was a test where they had the words down the left-hand side Mixed up definitions down the right side and you had to match the two . I said let's see who does best . Let me challenge you , and he did so . I Got all ten of them right , but I will say this I had the last couple . I had to use the process of elimination because I wasn't 100% sure and Probably , even though I had heard of all the words , personally I might only use six of them or so and Words that I use ungoingly . Well , by giving him that challenge that resulted with us being sarcastic each other . He buckled down and got all ten of them correct too . So did I have a part in that ? I want to think I did .

Speaker 1 15:49

I think the fact that I joke around with students sometimes I can get to motivate them . But be careful with your sarcasm . Don't embarrass students with it . But joke around with students with it . I'll say stuff that I make up sometimes . It's obvious . I've made it up to most of the students , but now is to the others . That's always pretty funny , but we got to be careful .

Speaker 1 16:16

As you go through substitute teaching , there's going to be things that you do . You might be a perfect substitute teacher and you're still going to do things that you regret later . Well , even though you can tell some of those bother me , I can't let it eat me up inside so much that I don't want to go back and see those students again . So Be careful about what you say . Don't overreact . That's the you know . It's just it's . There are some emotional Decisions that are good , or I should say that are okay , but those are the good decisions Most of the time . I can't think of an exception If you make an emotional decision . When you're upset , you will always make the wrong decision . I'll stand by that and dog on it . I don't regret that . I've said that . So do your best in the classroom . Try to forget about the regrets . You're just gonna have to move forward and maybe we can all kind of get to be better substitute teachers and We'll know what to say in those situations in the future . You